Thanks for NIP!!

An Iowa woman received quite a surprise on her thirty-third birthday. Jackie Johnson-Smith was having pizza with her family at Fongs in DesMoines when her baby got fussy. She began to nurse him with a cover, but noticed that waitress Bodi Kenney was glancing her way.

Like many mothers, Jackie has received critical stares for nursing in public (NIP). Thinking that perhaps the waitress was judging her, Jackie headed out to the car while her husband paid the bill.  In an interview with radio station KCCI she said, "I instantly felt panicked. Like, 'What is she thinking? Is she not wanting me to do it here?'"

So when her husband came out to the car with the receipt shown to the left in his hand, Jackie couldn't believe her eyes! Bodi had written, "I bought one of your pizzas. Please thank your wife for breastfeeding!!"

In her thank you note which she sent to Bodi's husband via Facebook (and subsequently  shared with Michele Zipp at The Stir,) Jackie expressed her feelings this way:

Jackie Johnson-Smith with her 3 children.

I didn't come from a breastfeeding family. I myself was formula fed as was common place through my family. My breastfeeding journey has been deeply personal with endless woes and triumphs. Your wife touched me in a place in my heart that is so tender, so raw and rooted and so very proud. Unbeknownst to her at the time it was also my 33rd birthday. I felt an amazing sense of belonging and optimism that day because of your wife's beautiful sentiment that is still carrying me days later.

Bringing it to Huntsville

This story really touched me. I have often tried to encourage moms I see nursing in public, but my fear has always been making a mom feel uncomfortable, so sometimes I just smile and say nothing. I decided after reading this that I need to do more! So I have created a special thank you note that I am keeping in my purse. It was inspired by the note Marley posted in her last blog. I have modified it a bit to make it my own, and added a $10 gift certificate to A Nurturing Moment as a special way to honor any mom I happen to see NIP.

So wherever I go, I am keeping my eyes open. I'm looking for that mom nursing discreetly in a sling. I'm watching for the mom sitting with a cover in the restaurant booth. I'm searching for moms Nursing In Public so I can hand them our special new note to say THANK YOU!

Maybe if we all look for moms who NIP and take time to say THANK YOU, we will make NIP a commonplace site right here in the Tennessee Valley!

Does "Breast is Best" Create a Hardship?

Photo of PumpEase courtesy of  http://www.snugabell.com/

I just came across an interesting article posted in the New York Times in which Jane Brody attempts to use a recent serial  interview study from Scotland to prove a point. She says the American Academy of Pediatrics goal that women exclusively breastfeed for about 6 months is unrealistic and imposes undue hardship on mothers. She relies somewhat on her personal experience 43 years ago when she had her twin sons early by C-section and pumped her milk as they were being fed formula in the hospital. Obviously that wasn't a terribly auspicious beginning for Ms. Brody, and she didn't have the advantage of a supportive lactation consultant since the profession didn't exist 43 years ago. Her OB was quite supportive, but her pediatrician was not, and I must say that I really admire her determination to breastfeed her sons despite some incredible obstacles and without a strong support network.

However, the thing that concerns me the most is the perception of a continued lack of support for nursing mothers in the workplace. Federal law mandates not only that breastfeeding mothers be given break time whenever they need to pump, but it also says that employers with 50+ employees are required to provide a place for pumping that is NOT a bathroom. Many employers have made huge strides in accommodating nursing mothers; nevertheless, some companies may still be unaware of the legal requirement to support these employees. It is vitally important that the women who work in these companies make their HR people aware of their responsibility.

A Nurturing Moment actually has a special program in place specifically designed to help employers offer the best support available to mothers. The return on investment is incredible. Cigna conducted a 2 year study of breastfeeding employees and found that their workplace lactation program produced the following results:

• $240 million annual savings in health care expenses
• 62% fewer prescriptions
• 77% reduction in absenteeism

Mutual of Omaha had the following results with their lactation program:

• 83% employee retention after maternity leave (national average is 59%)
• Healthcare claims per breastfed newborn averaged $1269 compared to $3415 for formula-fed infants.

That leads us into a discussion of my second major concern with Ms. Brody's article. She asserts that there is no research to back up the claims of the medical community that breastfed babies are healthier. It looks to me like Mutual of Omaha has done some research that backs that up!(Mutual of Omaha. (2001). Prenatal and lactation education reduces newborn health care costs.Omaha, NE: Mutual of Omaha.) Furthermore, the AAP statement is backed up by significant research. In fact, it contains 151 citations to support it's recommendations. The Academy of Breastfeeding Medicine has also responded to the Times article with a statement calling for enhanced support for all nursing mothers. 


This isn't about Mommy Wars or "Milk Wars." It's about a public health initiative. The worst thing that anybody can do is use guilt in an attempt to motivate a woman to nurse. Guilt is a lousy motivational tool. It is even more awful for anyone, breastfeeding advocate or not, to make a mother feel guilty about her feeding choice once that choice has been made. Life is just too short for guilt! 


So what do we need to do? First of all, we need to make sure that all mothers have access to good prenatal education about breastfeeding. They need to know that it may be challenging. They also need to know where to turn if they do have any problems.  Next, we need to realize that, as one mother so aptly put it, "It takes a village to breastfeed a baby." (thanks, Elizabeth!) That village includes health care providers, community support groups, family, friends, and breastfeeding professionals.  Finally, we all need to strive to make the workplace more supportive for nursing moms. Are you in management? Do you own a business? Do you know someone who does? Find out what they're doing to help their nursing mothers. Ask questions before you get pregnant. If your children are older, then see what you can do to smooth the way for younger women. If we all work together, we can help more moms succeed and avoid a lot of unnecessary guilt.

Let Us Know What You Think

Our goal at A Nurturing Moment is to provide you with the support and encouragement you need as you go through your pregnancy and embark on your parenting journey. We do that by providing support groups like Mommy Milk Meet-up and New and Expectant Parents' Meet-up. We also offer a variety of classes including breastfeeding, prenatal yoga, infant massage, childbirth and Music Together.  Our two International Board Certified Lactation Consultants are available to help you any time you have a breastfeeding problem. We'll listen to your concerns and give you advice over the phone, or you can make an appointment to come into the store for a consultation. We'll even come to you, if that would be easier! One of us is available 24/7. If the store is closed, you can call Glenni's cell phone at 256-658-8210.

We also try to provide the products that will make breastfeeding - and parenting in general - easier. From the Woombie swaddler to the Arm's Reach Co-sleeper, our products are designed to help you provide the very best, safest environment for your little one. That's why we only carry GreenGuard Certified cribs and crib mattresses - we want you  to know that when you buy an ANM product, it is the best available for your family!

Your feedback helps us know what we're doing right and what we need to do better. That's why we're having a contest this week encouraging you to leave your feedback. Our listing at Google places has a special place for you to leave a review. Please take just a moment to let us know what you think, then check it off in the contest below. You'll be entered to win some fun prizes that you and baby are sure to enjoy!

Grandma Time

Since our move to our new location, our Grandma traffic has increased. I think it's because of our proximity to Victoria's Cafe, a perennial favorite with ladies of all ages in Huntsville! At any rate, I love it when ladies about my age come in and eagerly search for the perfect gift item. It's really fun to see their excitement about their grandbabies.

I love to engage them in conversation and hear all about the pregnant daughter or daughter-in-law, or the new baby who has just joined the family. Those who are grandmothers-to-be for the very first time joyfully anticipate stepping into this new season of life. They can't wait to be part of that baby's life.

And unfortunately, therein lies the problem for some new moms. Every mother wants the chance to parent her baby the way she feels is best. There is a lot of  information available today that wasn't available 20 or 30 years ago. What your mother or mother-in-law did may not be exactly what you want to do. Perhaps your mother-in-law didn't breastfeed and can't imagine why you want to. Every time your baby cries, she assumes he's hungry and urges you to give him formula. Or maybe your mother thinks you are spoiling your baby by wearing her and picking her up when she cries.

It is extremely challenging for a new mother to get conflicting advice on every side. While you don't want to alienate your mother or mother-in-law, you do want to help her understand your need to parent your way and, if necessary, learn from your own mistakes just like she did. There are several things you can do to reassure her that you want her to be part of your baby's life while simultaneously letting her know you need your space.

• If you're breastfeeding, give her a copy of an article written just for grandmothers about nursing
• If you are focused on having an attached relationship with your infant, and the grandmothers don't understand, Dr. Jim Sears has some helpful words
• Sometimes giving her something meaningful to do can help. Ask your parents or in-laws to focus on the legacy they leave as grandparents by encouraging them to chronicle their lives for your children in a special journal
• Write a letter affirming her and letting her know specifically how she can help you as a new mother
• Feel free to send (or bring) her to ANM where we'll gently affirm what a great job you're doing as a mom, and help Grandma relax a little bit.

Whether you're a mom or a grandma, remember that kind, encouraging words are wonderful building blocks for life-long relationships. Be sure to use plenty of them as you interact with the most important people in your life!

Good Daddies

It's hard being a new parent. That may be the understatement of the year!! We usually focus on the tough adjustment that Mom has to make, but Dad faces some pretty serious changes, too! I love it when couples come in for a consultation together. I love to see fathers who are supportive and head-over-heals in love with both mom and baby. One couple I saw recently stood out because Dad was so concerned about every detail of Mom's breastfeeding. He called me several times after the consult with additional questions and was so appreciative of the support we were providing their family.

 That's why it is so painful for us to see fathers who aren't supportive. When Dad is so concerned about getting his sleep, about getting Mom back to work, about having us "fix things" so they can leave quickly, it really raises some red flags. New moms are experiencing some dramatic hormonal changes, and it's normal for them to feel a little weepy. But woe to the BAD DAD who is the cause of his wife's tears! I wish we could wave a magic "Be Kind to Your Wife" wand, and help fathers like that learn to support their wives. Unfortunately, we don't have a magic wand like that, so sometimes we end up just crying with Mom!

 I think every expectant father should be required to read Father's First Steps: 25 Things Every New Dad Should Know by Robert Sears and James Sears. Thing 7 that every new dad should know is "You Are Part of the Breastfeeding Team." If every father could just understand how critical his support is to his wife's breastfeeding success, our job as lactation consultants would be so much easier! Men who read this book (which is available at A Nurturing Moment) will have a head start on understanding how to be a really good daddy. So if you know a father-to-be, do his wife a favor, and get him a copy of this amazing little book!