Grandma Time

Since our move to our new location, our Grandma traffic has increased. I think it's because of our proximity to Victoria's Cafe, a perennial favorite with ladies of all ages in Huntsville! At any rate, I love it when ladies about my age come in and eagerly search for the perfect gift item. It's really fun to see their excitement about their grandbabies.

I love to engage them in conversation and hear all about the pregnant daughter or daughter-in-law, or the new baby who has just joined the family. Those who are grandmothers-to-be for the very first time joyfully anticipate stepping into this new season of life. They can't wait to be part of that baby's life.

And unfortunately, therein lies the problem for some new moms. Every mother wants the chance to parent her baby the way she feels is best. There is a lot of  information available today that wasn't available 20 or 30 years ago. What your mother or mother-in-law did may not be exactly what you want to do. Perhaps your mother-in-law didn't breastfeed and can't imagine why you want to. Every time your baby cries, she assumes he's hungry and urges you to give him formula. Or maybe your mother thinks you are spoiling your baby by wearing her and picking her up when she cries.

It is extremely challenging for a new mother to get conflicting advice on every side. While you don't want to alienate your mother or mother-in-law, you do want to help her understand your need to parent your way and, if necessary, learn from your own mistakes just like she did. There are several things you can do to reassure her that you want her to be part of your baby's life while simultaneously letting her know you need your space.

• If you're breastfeeding, give her a copy of an article written just for grandmothers about nursing
• If you are focused on having an attached relationship with your infant, and the grandmothers don't understand, Dr. Jim Sears has some helpful words
• Sometimes giving her something meaningful to do can help. Ask your parents or in-laws to focus on the legacy they leave as grandparents by encouraging them to chronicle their lives for your children in a special journal
• Write a letter affirming her and letting her know specifically how she can help you as a new mother
• Feel free to send (or bring) her to ANM where we'll gently affirm what a great job you're doing as a mom, and help Grandma relax a little bit.

Whether you're a mom or a grandma, remember that kind, encouraging words are wonderful building blocks for life-long relationships. Be sure to use plenty of them as you interact with the most important people in your life!

Good Daddies

It's hard being a new parent. That may be the understatement of the year!! We usually focus on the tough adjustment that Mom has to make, but Dad faces some pretty serious changes, too! I love it when couples come in for a consultation together. I love to see fathers who are supportive and head-over-heals in love with both mom and baby. One couple I saw recently stood out because Dad was so concerned about every detail of Mom's breastfeeding. He called me several times after the consult with additional questions and was so appreciative of the support we were providing their family.

 That's why it is so painful for us to see fathers who aren't supportive. When Dad is so concerned about getting his sleep, about getting Mom back to work, about having us "fix things" so they can leave quickly, it really raises some red flags. New moms are experiencing some dramatic hormonal changes, and it's normal for them to feel a little weepy. But woe to the BAD DAD who is the cause of his wife's tears! I wish we could wave a magic "Be Kind to Your Wife" wand, and help fathers like that learn to support their wives. Unfortunately, we don't have a magic wand like that, so sometimes we end up just crying with Mom!

 I think every expectant father should be required to read Father's First Steps: 25 Things Every New Dad Should Know by Robert Sears and James Sears. Thing 7 that every new dad should know is "You Are Part of the Breastfeeding Team." If every father could just understand how critical his support is to his wife's breastfeeding success, our job as lactation consultants would be so much easier! Men who read this book (which is available at A Nurturing Moment) will have a head start on understanding how to be a really good daddy. So if you know a father-to-be, do his wife a favor, and get him a copy of this amazing little book!

Win a Cloth Diaper

Lots of expectant parents come into the store, see our selection of cloth diapers, and begin to ask questions. Usually they assume that it's pretty time-consuming and maybe just a little bit disgusting. Sometimes they start out feeling that way, but end up deciding to give it a try.

So what is it about cloth diapering that changes their minds?

Maybe it's the fact that cloth diapers are a lot healthier for babies than chemical-laced disposables.
Or maybe it has to do with all the money they can save - researchers say that cloth diapering can save you $3500 a year.
Or maybe they want to do their part to help the environment by not throwing thousands of disposable diapers into landfills where they will never biodegrade.
But sometimes parents choose to try cloth diapering simply because it's so easy and the diapers are just so adorable!

Then we have the parents who come in when their baby is several months old. They are tired of leaky disposables. They are tired of diaper rashes that won't go away. And they are desperate for help. It makes us so happy to be able to guide them into the right diaper solutions for their infant. Our team of cloth diapering experts can help parents determine which diaper will work best for baby's size and body type. We can explain the pros and cons of various systems. And we can troubleshoot if you're having problems with your fluff (cloth diapering addicts refer to their stash of cloth diapers as fluff).

Want to learn more? We're having a cloth diapering class and diaper swap on Saturday, October 29. The class is at 10:30, and the swap begins at 11:00. Why not come learn a little more about cloth diapering and see what you think. Enter the contest below for a  chance to win some fluff!

Christmas Pictures That Capture the Meaning of the Season

For many parents, Christmas pictures involve little Sally sitting on Santa's lap. They are adorable and sweet, but sometimes you just want something different. Sometimes you want to get back to the heart of Christmas by focusing on something other than the jolly old chap in red.

This year A Nurturing Moment and Lighthouse Photography are thrilled to present "A Child Is Born" Christmas pictures. The traditional setting will feature a nativity scene and Christmas decorations in muted Christmas tones, You can have one child or your whole family in the picture. The package prices include sitting fees, and are really reasonable!

• Package A - $75 (session fee, 1 unit, online gallery to share & picture ornament) 
• Package B - $150 (session fee, 2 units, 9 custom Christmas cards, online gallery & picture ornament)
•  Package C - $300 (session fee, printable CD for 3 poses, 25 custom Christmas cards, online gallery and picture ornament) 
•  A unit is 1 8X10, 2 5X7''s, 3 4X6's or 8 wallets 

 If you think friends from your church or moms group might be interested, please share this with them. We are scheduling pictures for Saturday, Nov. 5. If we need to add an extra day, we will! We still have slots available, so call today to reserve your space!

Not My Plans

A few days ago a young man came into the store to see what we have and to introduce himself and his business. As he was leaving, he commented on the cross we have hanging behind the desk with these words,"I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for good and not calamity, to give you a hope and a future." (Jeremiah 29:11) He asked if we were a "Christian business" of if we just sold that kind of artwork. I wasn't quite sure how to answer him...

On the one hand, we don't advertise ourselves as a Christian business, because our mission is to support all parents, regardless of what they believe. I would hate for anyone who doesn't share my faith to feel uncomfortable in our store. What a person believes or doesn't believe has no relationship to my desire to help her have the best possible experience shopping during her pregnancy or getting the breastfeeding support she needs.

On the other hand, I truly view my business as belonging to the Lord. In my personal life, I seek to honor Him in all I do, and my business is a natural extension of that. I regularly pray for our moms and ask God for wisdom when I'm working with moms and babies. I don't always talk about God in the store, but He is never far from my mind because I fully recognize that the success of my business is in His hands. I know that I can't do it on my own. I truly need divine wisdom and guidance. When I am week, He is strong. I'm so glad that my Father knows the plans He has for me!

So that's exactly how I responded to my new friend. It opened up a door for a wonderful conversation as he shared his faith with me and talked about his upcoming wedding. I felt incredibly blessed and thankful for the cross hanging behind my counter that opened the door to such a terrific conversation!